Hi, I feel the need to go off on a big rant today, don't really know where I'm going with it, but lets go for it anyway!
I'm sitting here at work, as usual feeling like i'm wasting my life. Yesterday I was meant to be making up hours, but left early because I just couldn't stand wasting another minute pissing about in here. There's people out there with really meaningful lives doing important things everyday, and i'm rotting away in mundane Karen Land. I know I should be grateful that I have a job, blah blah blah. Sometimes you just can't be eternally positive and you just have to have a great big moan!
Of course it's all my own fault, you don't get anywhere in life by sitting on your fat ass, moaning and hoping that the life changing event you dream of happening just comes and say's hello to you one day!
We have to take responsibilty for our lives, of course we do, who else is going to, I just wish I knew how to do that...Would anyone out there like to sort my life out for me because I haven't managed to work it all out myself yet! I do believe i've just constradicted myself there.
Anyway.. I just need a fresh start, something new and challenging. Who's with me? who wants to go on a Journey? Lets all walk out of work we hate today! see that's it I'll me a motivational speaker, would you listen to me?
3 comments:
That wasn't a long rant by any means, miss, but a good one regardless :)
One thing I've noticed is that when you get inspired like this, you always finish off by asking who else is going to join you in your endeavours. (I've noticed you do similar things on Bebo too.) Is there a reason why that's so important? Is it that the task seems too immense to take on alone? Is it so you have someone to share the disappointment and guilt if it all goes wrong? Or is it that success for is only relative to how other people measure it? (If a Karen falls in a forest and no-one's around to hear it, does she make a noise?) Maybe you just prefer shared experiences to solitary ones.
Either way, you have more than enough skills and ambition to succeed at whatever it is you put your mind to. And you don't need anyone else's help, approval or presence to achieve it. Thing is, I know you know this. It can sometimes be helpful to remember that the 'people out there with really meaningful lives' have exactly the same insecurities and fears as everyone else. But more important is to remember that your life is equally meaningful. It finds meaning in the thoughts in your head, the hopes and fears you hold, and the love of the people whose lives you touch every day. (Yeah, I guess I'm one of them. :p)
Sorry for this out-of-character schmaltz, kiddo :) If you want a change, make it happen - you've done it before. If you want to be a motivational speaker you could do it no probs, but I'd suggest that rather than worrying about who else is listening, you have a crack at listening to yourself.
Feel the love!
NJM xo
I think your rant back to me was better than mine ;) you've asked too many questions for me to answer.. haha. I don't know why I ask others to come along with me, I'll have to go away an analyse that maybe. :)
Thanks for the nice story and of course yes I do know it all. I feel like i'm kind of stuck in life. I'm never happy with what i'm doing, probably because I get no sense of acheivement from it... it's not important to me and therefore I don't really care. I do care about photography and get a lot from it, but right now that's not what takes up most of my life, thank God I do have it though otherwise I'd go mental!!
anyway i'm waffling on here...
Waffling is good, I do it regularly :)
I don't see how you can say you're 'stuck' in life, but then again I've no idea what you're really feeling. You're working hard at securing a qualification and learning so much new and exciting stuff in the process. You've been on more holidays in the past year than most people manage in a decade. In the past year you've developed your photography from a few snaps into work people deem worthy of paying good money for. You've claimed your independence by moving away from home, have the admiration and respect of your colleagues in your job (like it or not), and just last night you booked ANOTHER break abroad. Stuck? I can't keep up with you!
Of course this means little if you're unhappy inside. There's ways to deal with that sort of thing too. Taking a brutal look at yourself and your REAL fears can be terrifying, but incredibly liberating. You've got any number of people you could talk to in total confidence, and nobody will judge you, because they already know and care for you. Anything they can do to help you get more fun and enjoyment out of life is a joy for them and a bonus for you.
I'd better switch my ranting engine off now, or we could be here all day. ;)
NJM
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